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Guest
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Posted: Sun Jun 28, 2009 9:12 pm Post subject: Poor pyro 4th |
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Dear Lama,
As fate would have it, as usual, I've got too many car projects and things going on to properly fund my pyro fetish. I've got sone options but each trip comes with it's own heavy cons. With this I don't really feel like blowing things up this year.
What's a pyro to do?
Sincerely,
Porno for Pyros |
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Guest
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Posted: Sun Dec 27, 2009 8:36 pm Post subject: |
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Dear Pyro,
I must be carefull in answering this one, as I don't want to get anyone in any legal trouble. My first thought, was just burn down your neighbors house, while you run around in the street flying old glory. But, I am thinking that is not such a great idea, and maybe I shouldn't even remotely suggest that...shoot I just did.
I have put a lot of thought into this, and I do have a solution, it is complicated, involved and downright crazy...perfect.
Step #1 -- Collect garbage...lots of garbage. Your neighbors won't miss it, just get to theirs before the garbage man does. Stock pile it.
Step #2 -- Stop showing. I know it sounds wierd, but give me a chance, the rest of the plan will explain this.
Step #3 -- Put the garbage in your bath tub. (thus step #2). Most biological stuff will break down into cool stuff that burns. If you sort through the garbage and find startches and sugars, you are on your way.
Step #4 -- build a distiller. You gotta get your bath-tub hooch potent enough to make a good show.
Step #5 -- Molotov time. Come the big day to celebrate, fill up some bottles, top with a rag, and huck away. You get the craziest firework show in history, and for zero cost to you.
Lighting a fire,
The Lama |
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